Today was the first day of the rest of my life...not really. It was just the first day in my volunteer position. Let's just say, I love the job that I do. I get good food for a great price, but best of all, I get to sit and talk with people, which is exactly what I did today.
I felt kind of bad for sitting around talking, but I think I made someone's day today. I guess I was really beating myself up internally because I have this image of a hard-working volunteer. Perhaps I need to let go of this image and just do what will make the most of someone's day. If that is talking with someone, then that is it.
It's really an interesting and laid-back atmosphere, and almost feels like home. I love it so far, but it is still the first day. There is always a honeymoon period.
Anyways, there was a question that this woman I talked with asked that really got me to thinking about why I'm in the Nursing program rather than just in the Pre-Medicine program. CCU has both, but why am I so attracted to Nursing? The reason I came up with was that I wanted to get experience with the patient first, then go into medical school. When I am exposed to the patient and realize the reality of treating the patient first, I will be less likely to have the deep compassion and empathy for my patients stomped out by the grueling hours that medical school requires. To me, it makes sense to go into Nursing first. I guess it is my way of easing into the medical profession. If I like it and crave more and deeper learning, I will go deeper into that pool of medicine. If I feel that Nursing is right for me, I won't venture further. It lets me be open in my decision.
We also talked about doctors and empathy, and we both feel that there are some really bad doctors out there. Doctors can sometimes be condescending, and talking to her revealed that sometimes doctors can really not be in control of their emotions, especially judgment and anger. When this happens, the trust between patient and physician is broken and the quality of care is diminished. While I do realize that we aren't all perfect and physicians are people (which is why I think that patients should be allowed to tell their doctors to calm down if needed without feeling like their doctor will kick them out of their practice), but physicians have had more experience than the patient in this matter. I think that open judgment with hostility has no place in medicine unless it is followed up by a sense of caring for the patient (and then the physician really has to try to be sensitive because once the patient feels hurt, it takes so much to get them to trust the physician again, especially if there is no real relationship that exists-patients are more likely to work through this and to forgive when a relationship was built over time). I strongly believe that one cannot practice medicine without empathy without ending up with negative effects from it (in the relationship, to the patient and to the doctor as well). I know that many medical students go to medical school out of a sense of care for the patient and for helping relieve the suffering of others, and I urge those physicians who forgot that sense of care to remember why they went to medical school in the first place and for those physicians who haven't lost sight of it to never forget the reason they are doctors. I know that you doctors care deep down for your patients, don't be afraid to show it! Showing you care will not end up in a lawsuit. In fact, it will improve patient satisfaction and will foster a relationship with your patients. You'll be able to care very well for your patients, and they will come to you for insight rather than getting misinformation from other sources. This is the ideal situation that we should be aiming for, not isolation from the patient and an emotionless and mechanical way of diagnosing disease. If I wanted this kind of treatment, I would strive to invent a machine that can do this without the personal relationship that a physician provides. People need a stronger sense of understanding when injured and ill, not less, to help them heal, and physicians as well as nurses should provide this caring relationship (and perhaps even touch when appropriate).
On to ranting again. I really need to stop getting on my soapbox.
Anyways, I had a lovely day today, and can't wait until I go back tomorrow. I wonder what will happen tomorrow! I hope it will be a great surprise!
Good night all, and blessings and peace to all!
LiL A
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